First time buy house in jkt put all the effort , and so many love put there, i call it my first home , home that make me remember all about the love, effort, and memories in there, i called it " homey ". Now even i don't stay there, it's always in my pray. We belong to that house, but we can't use it , do we need to blame that? no no no , i don't ever think about that maybe others. everything have their reason. At least ,homey now give shelter to others, hope that who stay in homey will take good care of it, not only because they need it but hope they love it too. because with love u will take good care, not when the owners coming home, then take good care. hope u understand.
I'm not a calculative person, when i can help others, i try my best to help them. but ofcourse i want someone that i help can be a better person, can stand on their own feet. i don't have feeling pity to them but i love them. pity in my dictionary that if u pity on someone else, that's all about the material thing. everyone can be pity, please help me. but how long u can help them instead others that really in needy ? so i use the word " love " love means that u want to help them to stand on their feet so they don't feel pity to themself, or for others looking to them pity ,and they can give love to others too so all the love will continuosly flow.
Is it so difficult for others to accept this metaphor? or maybe i'm scared to make any trouble because i can't face my fear? any reason for that because i don't want have any trouble. but i ask my self today , do u want to be that person that have so many things in ur mind but u can't do it in action. what u scare? is it worthy for u to living for like this, have worry and hiding this thing that u know one day this maybe can be stabbing u and u just accept it without do the right thing? can u accept it?
I'm gratitude for everything i have and don't have. if i have it, it's become my responsible, isn't it? so why i must shut up because of fear? if trouble comes anything , still can face it, because u know u do the right thing, and take all the consequences. and still u know that "the almighty" will be witness. no need to find who right or wrong, just say what in ur minds and this burden&worry swept away and maybe ur good deeds can bloom one day in others, although the first at all u face the hard one. ( u know that how hard it is u can face it ) because it's not hard or easy but it just we call " life "
: )
* learn to make peace within myself *
